A Father is What a Father Should Be

This weekend is Father’s Day, so I would like to say a Father means more then just being a Father figure of the family. 

It also means : 

1. Each Father has a responsibility to looking after the well-being of his family, loving his children and hopefully teaching them to become responsible adults, where they too, show carrying love towards their children.  

2. The Father shares the responsibility with his loving wife or partner, working hard throughout their lives, ensuring their children receive unconditional love ❤️, warm shelter, food, the right education, clothing and protection from harms way.

3. A Father’s responsibility doesn’t end when his children grow up but continues giving advice towards the well being of his children, helping them out as much as he possibly can. The only difference, it’s up to the kids to make their own judgment, striving towards a responsible adult. At first your kids don’t understand your advice, but later on (with life experiences) come to you and say,” Now I understand what you were trying to say Dad.”  

4. A Father is a Dad. A Dad is one that will teach you new beginnings, such as riding your first bike or tying your shoes. He will also take you on a journey, exploring what the earth has to offer, from hiking to the top of a mountain to camping ⛺️ within our amazing provincial parks.  

5. A Dad will show you how important education really is, by introducing you to the science pavilions across Canada 🇨🇦 , or where he may reside. He may help you discover a new science experiment or take you gold panning, learning the science of geology. 

6. A DAD is a loving DAD who cares for his children and wife or partner. 

7. A LOVING DAD hopes his children take the right path in the future, to look after themselves and their new family. 

8. A LOVING DAD sometimes will bite his tongue, knowing you may have made some wrong choices, but realizes you will figure out in the end, either by your own experiences or life’s roadblocks.

In the end, a LOVING DAD will always love ❤️ his family. 

Life is a journey and you’re sure to make mistakes along the way.  

BUT – 

What’s really important in life, is your FAMILY. A LOVING FATHER/DAD will teach you, FAMILY is everything. If you can’t trust your family, you’ve lost everything in life. FAMILY means trust, love and even forgiveness.  

AND – 

If your MOM and DAD taught you right, you know when’s it’s time to step-up-to-the-plate and help your mom and dad. It’s the cycle of life.  

SO – 

I hope I’ve been a good DAD teaching my kids right from wrong, leading them towards kind loving adults, expecting nothing in return. I also hope that they respect me who I am and understand I only want the best in their welfare, loving them forever. 
As I head towards retirement, my wife and I will now take this time to enjoy the fruits of our labour, seeing our grandchildren grow into responsible adults to continue on the cycle of life. I hope for the best in my children and their partners, as they continue on into a brighter future. My love to my family.

Love DAD 

By Bari Demers – screenwriter and storyteller plus Scifi Art Gallery from Canada 🇨🇦 

552 words ( writers count)

Our Jenni

  
Photo Credit : Bari Demers 

Remembrance Day is just six days away. It’s a time to remember the brave souls who died for our freedom. Freedom has a price, only because mankind is selfish and blood thirsty for power.  
Remembering and never to forget, is very much like parents who have lost a child. Your memories over the years tend to become a ghostly presence of the past. But, as any grieving parent knows, we hold on dearly to our children’s memories, afraid they will fade away forever. 

Parents who have lost a child, are in club they never wanted to be apart of in the first place. 

Your life spirals out of control and you begin to hang on to hope. A hope that God and heaven are real, so one day you may be reunited with your loved ones. It’s like grasping onto a lottery ticket, hoping your numbers will finally be picked. But you know, the chances of seeing your child again are astronomically improbable.

So, what do parents do ? 

We remember. We remember the precious time we had with our loved ones. And so today, I would like to share that time with you. 

Jenni was just a baby before she died, but in that short time, she gave us a bundle of love I will never forget. As any proud father I would show her our world the best I could. Living in Calgary, Alberta at the time, working for an engineering design company (UMA) we were fortune enough to be close to the mountains. I would bundle up Jenni, like a mother kangaroo would do for her young joeys, and off we would go, exploring Banff, Lake Louise and parks throughout Calgary, including the Heritage Park Historical Village. 

It’s this memory that stuck with me throughout time. 

The Heritage Park Historical Village was the last good memory of Jenni. It will be a memory I will cherish forever, exploring together, as a family. 

I’ll never forget when Jenni was born in Edmonton, Alberta. Not only the fact, I would be a new father, but it was also the time, the nurses were on strike in Alberta. Heading to our closest hospital, the Misericordia, it wasn’t long we had to make another quick trip to the University Hospital because of the limited staff.

My wife having a baby was truly a big event, but never did I think a comical event would arise as well. To have a clear understanding of the situation, it’s important to understand, the University Hospital caters to students in the medical field. 

The delivery room was packed with interns, eager to learn and somewhat embarrassing for my wife, Patricia.  

There I was, all excited for the delivery of our first child, fully clothed in a interns smock, fashioned with the latest mask and booties. The nurse in charge had me sit at the head, so I wouldn’t get in the way of the doctor and my wife giving birth.  

It’s now 2:00 am.   

The paediatrician came in, giving his speech to the interns, when he noticed me. I am the only one sitting down. He barks,” What the hell do you think you ARE doing? Get up or get out!”

Tired and half a sleep, I jumped up, totally surprised by his misdemeanour.

The head nurse goes over and quietly speaks into the doctor’s ear. He gives an arrogant huffing sound, saying,” Well, everyone should be standing.”  

The room smirks with a soft laughter. Needless to say doctors are cranky this time of the morning. 

Jenni was born on April 23, 1980. A bundle of joy, as the interns clapped for the occasion.  

Getting the chance to hold Jenni, a precious little human being in my hands, was indeed a wonderful moment, one never forgets. 

We had but only a few precious months with Jenni, but it was a time of happiness which will stay with me forever.

On November 5, 1980 was the tragic day, Jenni past away from a rare strange disease, called,” Kawasaki disease”. It’s an illness that involves the lymph nodes for reasons unknown, effects children under the age of five years old. At the time, the diagnosis wasn’t clear to the countless doctors who visited Jenni’s hospital room, at the Foothills medical Centre. Two weeks in the hospital, test after test, no one could make clear of the diagnosis. Apparently, at this time, Kawasaki wasn’t understood, as it is today. Untreated, it can lead to serious complications that can affect the heart.  

And, unfortunately, that is exactly what happened. 

To this day, I believe every child deserves to see the world and live a full life. Each requires to be healthy, never going to bed hungry, have shelter & clothing and receive unconditional love. The saying, “Parents should never see their child die before them”, is so very true. 

Today, we are blessed with two daughters, Tianndra and Trisha, along with very precious grandchildren. Keep your children close to your hearts. Love them and be sure to say it as often as possible, because you never know what may happen in the future.

Patricia and I will always remember and never forget Jenni Michelle Demers.

By Bari Demers – screenwriter and freelance writer

UPDATE 2016 :  

During the fourth episode of the new TV Series Westworld by HBO, there’s a dialogue by Delores ( a robotic humanoid) who just lost her parents.  

She says” Pain. Their Loss… is all I have left of them. You think grieve would make you smaller and sad, like your heart will collapse in on itself, but it doesn’t…” 
Never did they know how close those very words are… so close to my heart . 

(In loving memory of my daughter, Jenni Michelle Demers – Nov 5 1980)

What Really Matters

Today’s reality is about: What is important and what really matters?

Throughout our lives we struggle with making a living and sometimes forget what really matters. With Christmas once again upon us, it reminded me of the time when I was a little boy writing letters to Santa.

As an adult my wish list has changed, but the question is, does it really matter? Notice the sarcastic approach to my letter:

Dear Santa, God and Whoville,

I’ve been sort-of-a-good boy, well ok then, I’m a man. That’s pretty close to being good, wouldn’t you say?

All boys are good right ? Right?

Anyway, I would like just a few things this year. Really, the list isn’t that bad.

First and foremost, $100 million, so I can start Pre-Production of my screenplay – check it out here, it’s a mix genre film. Be careful, for its a screaming horror combined with a captivating science-fiction plot, sure to make you shake in your boots.

Read my LOGLINE

Anyway, let’s move on…

Now, If you can’t afford $100 million, just buy my screenplay for $150,000, along with my credits . That’s sure to make me happy! Don’t forget to give the screenplay to the famous Directors and/or Producers. They would love to make BLACK ANGELS into a blockbuster film, guaranteed to jolt you from the dead.

Don’t worry, it’s not my first screenplay. I assure you won’t be disappointed.

Oh, yes.

I’m kind of loving the new Mercedes S Class 4-Door Sedan S63 AMG 4-MATIC with twin turbo V-8. It would be a dream to drive around in. I mean, after all, my lawyer is driving one. So, why can’t I?

Humour is always good in our lives, so how about the book, “Universe” by Close Encounters Studios. The more humour I can get my hands on, the better.

And well, you already know I love all things ALIEN, including NASA and SPACE EXPLORATION. If I could get a trip into Space or possibly see Cape Canaveral (located next door to Kennedy Space Center) and/or Virgin Galactic, it would certainly be a plus.

I could use some new running shoes. You know, the ones I can never afford.

And yes.

I lost my bike previously, so I would be gratefully to have another one. Unfortunately the one I’m interested in is at least $1800. Sorry about that, sounds like I’m falling into the bracket considered as “high-maintenance”. Yes, I understand this is a little expensive, but no more mountain bikes for me. I just realized last week I’m getting older. Go figure!

And –

It’s time to upgrade to a better home computer by APPLE, you know, the new one. Its only $ 2749.

Wait! I have a better idea. Stop all this madness ! Scrap all the above!

Let’s concentrate on just one gift and lets make it a priority:

“I would like all the sick children in the world to be healthy immediately.”

Yes, you heard right, make ALL CHILDREN in the world FREE from SICKNESS and DEATH.

Ok? Do that instead of the materialistic things above.

And send a message to all the movie, hockey and football stars, billionaires, entrepreneurs of the “Shark Tank” and “Dragons Den“, famous directors and producers to send a gift to the sick children of their local hospitals.

Send this forward – Lets help our sick children.

Oh !

And one last thing, I would like to retire back home in the Okanagan. Really tired of having to wake-up to minus -40C weather, up here in the Great White North. As much as I love Canada, my bones need a little warmth.

Ok. So, I believe I’ve covered everything.

Don’t forget!

Every child deserves to see the world and live a full life. Each requires to be healthy, never going to bed hungry, have shelter & clothing and receive unconditional love. Let’s make their lives a happy one!

Alright then, I believe that’s it. Parents should never see their child die before them.

Sincerely,
Bari Demers
(In loving memory of my daughter, Jenni Michelle Demers – Nov 5 1980)